“Are we on the same page?”
“K I ♥ U”
“Was that a ‘yes’ or a ‘no’?”
“MY ASSHOLE BFF MIKE BACK”
“What for?”
“K8T NDS HM’
Ah. Are you gonna talk to him? You probably should, no?
“IALREADYDID”
Oh, sweet. Is everything cool between you two?
“YES-“
I know, I know. You had more to say, but I was getting impatient with your pendulum swings. Sorry, babe.
“UBITCH”
“Does Chef sleep in the nude? I got ten bucks that say he does not.”
Probably a full-on pajama set. Top and matching trunks. Pale blue. Maybe even one of those nightcaps like Fred Mertz wore to bed. No, not ‘probably’. Definitely.
“FUNNYIMBENTOVERLAUGHING”
Me, too!
A little bird told me Chef is fifty-three years old. Tell me that is true, please?
Chef swears I will never find out his age. So far he is right, dang it.
“ANOLDFARTMAYBEBUTNOTFIFTYTREE“
Oh, fine. Don’t ever tell me. I will just wait until I finally get those pants off and check your driver’s license.
“WORKSFORME”
“WHATMKSUTINKTHEINFORMAYSHUNONMYDRIVERSLICENSEWILLBETRUE?”
Good point.
How was your Christmas holiday? Did you end up going to see your family?
“IWENTHOME”
How are your babies? I bet they miss you when you are away from them.
“IAMLOVINGTHEFACTTHATUASKED”
Well, you talk about them like they are pretty important to you. I remembered.
Oh yeah, before I take off to go play a couple games of pool,, last night I pulled cards. The question I asked was, “What are some of the dirty things he is fantasizing about doing with me?“

“WOW!REALLYLAIDALLTHATOUTTHEREDIDNTU?”
You said, “LAID.” 😂
I’ll be back in a bit. Spring some of that pool juju of yours down on a bitch, will you please?
“OIBWITHYOUALWAYSALREADY”
“UTNKUDATGOODSOFASTFORNOWEESON?NOPECUZMEINYOUDATSWHY”
“IAGWEE“
“NOWHIFFUEXCUSEMEIHAVE2DOLLARSINQUARTERSTOBLOWONSOMENINEBALL.”
“YOUSAIDBLOW“
***back in a bit***
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