One of the things I learned early in life is that when someone doesn’t feel threatened by you, they don’t bother to waste their time and energy on you. If someone doesn’t care, they just don’t bother. Think about it. Do you lose sleep over the jerk who happened to flip you off after you accidentally cut them off making that lane change? No, you don’t. You see what I mean, right?
This whole frickin journey is about learning life lessons and it sucks. Granted, the end result is worth it. The end result being that you become a much better person than you were before. Someone who loves unconditionally. For those who are a little unsure of exactly what that means, it’s loving someone without conditions. (Like having money and/or status, for this specific example.) It’s becoming someone you can actually be proud of yourself. Someone who no longer gives a fuck about what others think about you. Someone who can identify the people who mistreat you and lay down boundaries in a healthy way when they do mistreat you. Someone who is strong enough to ditch the assholes who do not respect those boundaries and kick them out of their lives. I NEVER thought I could ever become someone who doesn’t care what anyone thinks about me. I NEVER thought I could get over codependency issues and people pleasing issues due to the life I lived being raised by a very overbearing and overprotective narcissistic mother.
But guess what? I fucking NAILED it. And it’s all because of this whole fiasco called a Twin Flame Journey. I am proud of the bitch I am today and I can stand up tall and say it loud. I never could before. I currently live with a text-book case Narcissistic Personality Disorder woman with whom I get daily practice on setting and keeping boundaries. I managed to go ‘no contact’ with my Dildo Ex Narcissist Boyfriend Wesley, who CONTINUES to create multiple, fake accounts on Quora and my blog stalking me. I have a trash can FULL of his unread and unposted comments smearing me AND begging me to contact him because he “loves me soooo much.” Yawn. I keep wondering when he will finally just leave me alone and understand it’s over FOR-E-VER.
But, I am getting off track a bit. What prompted today’s post was the fact that my DM’s Crazy Golddigger Karmic, who was put in my DM’s life to teach him some life lessons on understanding that it’s not what people think about you that’s important in life. It’s what is in your heart that tells people you are a great person. His Crazy Golddigger Karmic is there to show him that while she can continue to abuse him emotionally behind closed doors, cheat on him with those close to him, (yes, I know about that and so does he, you bitch), my DM will learn soon enough that he is strong enough to not put up with that shit anymore and leave the bitch. He is going to learn soon enough that it doesn’t matter what all 1,000 plus of his Facebook friends think about him unless they like and love him for the AMAZING and COMPASSIONATE and AWESOME man he already is.
Now, before you starting thinking, “What the hell do you know about their situation?”, let me tell you I have experienced first hand both examples of her being a golddigger AND crazy and emotionally abusive. The very first time I realized he was with someone toxic was at his workplace. He had just come back from Vegas having won some cash and I saw him counting out hundreds on her out-stretched hand. THIS is what got me, though. After he stopped. She gave him this look that clearly said, “Is that all?”, so he continued to count out another few hundred. ARE YOU SHITTING ME? I knew right away what she was all about and I will admit I was a bit disappointed that such a wonderful guy would allow a woman to treat him in such a manner. I referred to my DM as SuperFish after that, privately, with his brother, who agreed with me. He is all about status and what people think. But again, not for long. I remember asking his brother about her fake boobs one day. I was like, “Say, did your brother buy her those or did she come with those?” His response that I STILL laugh to myself about to this day was,” Oh, she came with those.”
Here is another example. The one time I made it to my DM’s house for something completely innocent and that was helping him set up his Firestick with the KODI app. (Apparently my DM, while extremely smart, is not as technically saavy as I am and needed some assistance.) It was early evening and I thought it weird that he asked me to bring over beer. (Stella of all beers. I would have chosen Blue Moon, personally.) The Crazy Golddigger Karmic was at work. At this point, we are just friends and he coaches me in pool. (He is an amazing player and that is the only reason I am as good as I am after only 3 years. ) I buy the beer and walk my ass to their pad and he is outside with her little clutch dog, leash in hand, waiting for the dog to pee so we can go inside.
Guess what went on in the short time I was there? It was like hanging out with a buddy I’ve known for years. I helped him hang up some lights out on the patio and we just rapped about our lives like any friends, while sipping a beer and hanging lights and I was setting up his Amazon Firestick with KODI. It was way cool and again, completely innocent.
Now, wanna know when I figured out some shit about him and his Crazy Golddigger Karmic? Here is a guy who is newly engaged to the bitch and he wants a family, kids, the whole shabang. But, I pointed out to him that night that I thought it weird that they had just moved into a smaller apartment with only one bedroom and EVERYTHING he mentioned about his future on what he wants to do in life was never involving her. He used the word, “I”, never “We” or “Us”. Kind of funny for a guy who is ready to settle down and start a family. When I asked things about when they were setting a wedding date, it was met with, “Um, uh, well we are very close to doing that.” (Again, weird.) He has never once expressed how he feels about her to me. Never said, “Christina, she is AMAZING and I love her so much!” Nothing. She was not mentioned the entire time I was there that night. And here we are talking about life and our futures and what we want out of life. Odd?
Then things got awkward. All the time we are talking, he is walking around the apartment doing this and doing that and at a certain point, he went to sit down next to me on the couch. I was sitting in the middle and I would have thought he would have said, “Hey, scoot over,” or something like that, but he didn’t. I had a sudden, nervous feeling combined with intense arousal. That is when the front door open and in the bitch walked. He jumped up, practically tripping over the coffee table and is acting as if my Dad just walked in on us with his hand underneath my blouse. I shit you not. What’s worse, is he didn’t even acknowledge her until SHE said something like, “Um, how about saying hi or something when I walk in the door.” That’s when I said, “Um, this is awkward. I’m gonna take off. Your Firestick remote is right there and you are all set up.” He made me take what was left of the beer and I blew that popsicle stand.
I’d have bet all the money in the world AND my precious pool cue that when he sat down on the couch that close to me, he was going to try and kiss me. Thank GOD he didn’t. Not only was I already scared to death he was going to the moment he sat down, but she would have definitely caught us and this whole Journey could have been SO much worse.
I discovered later that she had happened to come home early that night. Talk about the Universe stepping in, huh?
Not long after that, the telepathy with he and I got very intense and I assumed I was going nuts. I started doing research and started to discover this Twin Flame crap. I was also getting help from the Universe in a lot of ways. YouTube kept recommending videos for me to watch with titles like “Signs He Likes You, But Is Trying To Hide It”. I already was pretty good at reading people and all these videos did was confirm what I already felt-and that was that he did in fact have a thing for me, but was trying desperately to hide it. I didn’t want to believe it either. No way could he dig a dork like me, right? Not when he has this gorgeous, golddigging nutjob who looks GREAT on his arm when they are out. Someone whom all of his friends liked to see with him. Wait…correction. He doesn’t know that a few of his friends had already told me that they felt their engagement was just for show. That something seemed off about it. But, I never shared those things with him. It was not my place.
Right after he had his twin brother pick a fight with me to have me kicked out of the bar one night, starting Separation, I sent some text messages to my DM expressing my thoughts on this whole thing. Everything from why he acts so weird when he is around me, like he has some kind of secret crush on me, to why he never mentions the Crazy Golddigger Karmic when he talks about his life in the future. Turns out he SAVED all my text messages. Now, a guy that thinks nothing of some crazy chick harrassing him doesn’t KEEP her text messages. Not only that, the bitch went through his phone and found all my texts. She finds the cue stick of mine that he kept after replacing the tip. She is seeing subtle signs in him that he is beginning to change, but for the good. (Not good for her, but good for him.)
Now, you tell me. If she truly was confident in knowing that what they have is true love, would there be any need to stalk my Facebook page and have her friends stalk my Quora posts so that she can try and show just how happy they are? Why would there be any need to go to all the trouble if I truly wasn’t a threat? What gets me is that both her and her flying monkey that posted the above picture, with no regard for my DM’s anonymity, thought for one second that what they did is just confirming her fear that my DM is going to leave her, with his money, and jet to a girl who loves him for everything he is and could care less if he was overdrawn in his checking account every day of the week.
A month ago, I would have felt anger towards her and would be busy planning my revenge. Instead, all I feel is compassion for the bitch because she is truly so unhappy with herself on the inside that she feels she needs people to like her for what she looks like. Imagine how she must have grown up to have a thought process like that? “I need everyone to see me!” Do you know his Facebook page has a picture of him and her. Mind you, his face looks like someone is holding a gun to his head to get him to smile, but at least he was proud enough to post that he is with her. But, HER Facebook page? It’s just her gorgeous self, in the sunset, alone. No status or indication she is with anyone. It’s a Facebook page of someone who is single. (Which explains her infidelity. But, that’s another blog post.)